I have a hard time understanding why Medicare does not cover under the Part A & B and now the Part D certain diabetic supplies that are essential. I have to pay around $20 a box for the insulin syringes I need to inject my Novolog and Lantus. The alcohol prep pads are not covered either.

Along with the diabetic supplies that I need that are not covered, I have a problem with my hearing in both of my ears.

Medicare does not cover hearing aids and exams for the purpose of fitting a hearing aid. (Source: Medicare & You 2008 Handbook, Section 1, page 26)

My old hearing aids are 9 years old that I wear and use every day. I can tell my hearing is not at the level it should be to hear clearly after 9 years. The cost to get new hearing aids similar to the type I have now is around $2,500 per hearing aid. I don’t have $5000 to get new aids. My daughter tells me I talk too loud and the TV is too loud. Though I sit in my recliner right next to the TV, I am still experiencing more hearing loss. I love when no one is home and I can turn on the TV or radio to the level I can hear comfortably and no one complains at me.

If you have ever lived next door to some one who is hard of hearing or deaf, now you know the United States government will not help them to hear. I think that is a discrimination!

When a loved one is elderly or your best friend is not well, we realize just how precious their time is here on Earth.

My long time best friend of 21 years fell last Sunday and shattered part of hip bone. I wish I could be with her and help her. I know the kind of pain she has been experiencing after breaking my left tibia last year. She had surgery on Wednesday morning to put a plate and 3 screws on her left hip she told me. She is home now and having difficulty getting around with a walker. Oh how I wish I could just fly down and help her.

Grandma McCort was in ICU since last Saturday night till yesterday. She is ready with go be with the Lord and her husband who went to be with the Lord in 1999 and one of her daughters who went to be with the Lord in 2002. Grandma said she is tired. I just wanted to spend some time with her yesterday. I stayed while she slept and watched her breathing. She woke when dinner was being brought into her and her roommate’s room. I was able to get her to drink and eat. It surprised the nurses and one of her daughters, granddaughter and great granddaughter who all work at the nursing home. I was pleased she would eat and drink for me as she had not eaten since Sunday. Grandma is a fighter inside I know. There has been two other times she gave up but fought her way back. I am going back Saturday to see her. Whatever is God’s will concerning Grandma McCort, I will accept. Grandma has been wonderful to me.

I did take all my medications and my diabetic supplies, e.g. Med-Port bag containing my refrigerated insulin, syringes, lancets and my glucometer with me when I drove to see Grandma as I was not sure what situation I was facing. Since I stayed so long and still had to drive back last night, I was glad I took my medications with me.

I have enjoyed the peace and quiet around the house lately. The phone doesn’t ring as much since she has been gone to Florida. My youngest daughter has surprised me and called home 3 times since Tuesday afternoon. Today, she is getting to spend time with her older sister at Walt Disney World. I truly hope they are enjoying their time together. They only get to see each other so little. This past summer they spent a week together at my oldest daughter’s home. With their age difference and the distance apart that they live makes it difficult for them to see each other often.

As a mother, I feel very good that my daughters love each other and want a relationship. Knowing they are smiling and laughing with each other today makes me feel good inside. I do know my oldest daughter will have “the big sister talk” with my youngest about the situation with me. My oldest daughter is very protective of me, as I am with her.

Having this wonderful peace and quiet has been so nice, no stress. I am not lonely at all. My blood sugar has been much better the last two days. This is a relief with my diabetic symptoms.

My youngest daughter leaves on her band’s Disney trip today at 2 PM.  They have a long trip ahead of them by motor coach. They do get to go to other places besides Disney World in Florida.

Tomorrow morning they get to go to Cocoa Beach for a day in the sun, surf and sand. Then they get to go into Ron Jon’s Surf Shop, the “Largest Surf Shop in the World”. Not many of them will be able to buy a surf board and put on top of the bus. They will buy plenty of T-shirts.They will go to the Jetty Park at Port Canaveral where they will get to see Kennedy Space Center’s launch pads in the distance and have a cook out there. Afterwards on to the hotel at Disney. To top off the day, they get to go to Medieval Times Dinner Show and Tournament.

Thursday, they go to Epcot at the WDW Resort. The band will be performing at Epcot at the World Showcase March in the early evening. So they have the day to wander 3 different parks.

Friday, they get to eat at the Rainforest Cafe for breakfast at downtown Disney. Then to Animal Kingdom in the morning, Disney’s Hollywood Studios in the afternoon and then a do not miss show of Fantasmic. The Fantasmic is where Disney characters arise on giant mist screens 50 feet high and 100 feet wide to familiar Disney melodies.

Saturday, the band group gets to go to Planet Hollywood for breakfast. Then they go to Magic Kingdom  at 10 AM till 10 PM to load up on the buses to head home.

I hope there are 2 bus drivers to rotate on coming and going to Florida because of the long driving trip. The band will be back around 6:30 PM Sunday night. I am going to enjoy the quietness around the house. Though I do wish I could have afforded to send myself to Florida to visit my oldest daughter and friends. The cost for my youngest daughter for just the main part of the trip is $500, not counting for souvenirs and extra food cost. Hope she has fun as this is her Senior year in high school.

What a weekend of fun and joy! Spending time with some of my relatives. My almost 2 year old niece, Faith, has finally starting talking away. The doctors said that nothing was wrong with Faith when she didn’t start talking when she should have. She would start talking when she was ready. Now she talks non-stop. It was a joy to watch her in her little coat and short legs running across the yard to find the easter eggs. There were plastic eggs filled with money and hard boiled eggs. The family had hard boiled egg for her to color the day before. She wanted to eat egg and shell her grandmother told me. We had a good laugh at the antics of Faith.

The Easter meal consisted of ham and a lot of different foods. However mostly starches and sweets which is high in carbohydrates. Three of us are diabetics that were there. I had made a sugar free pistachio cool whip pineapple salad.

1 box Jello Sugar Free – Fat Free Instant Pistachio Pudding
2 – 8 oz. containers Kraft Cool Whip Sugar Free Topping
1/4 to 1/2 cup well drained crushed pineapple

Mix the dry pudding mix into the cool whip. Add the pineapple.

After having a wonderful time with the relatives and eating too many things I shouldn’t have, I had to get home to check my blood sugar. I had forgotten to bring my glucometer with me. My reading was not good, 556. Had to take a 10 units of Novolog. Then I checked my blood sugar in 2 hours. My blood sugar was still 196.

I really blew it today and yesterday with handling my blood sugar. Yesterday I bought one of the chocolate Easter eggs filled with cherry nut. I thought a 3 oz. chocolate egg wouldn’t raise my blood sugar so high, but it did. It will take a few days to get my blood sugar back in control.

Today was a quieter day. It almost seemed strange. Even the traffic outside seemed to be quieter. I even got the chance to sleep in longer this morning till the telephone rang.

It was my younger daughter telling me there was no school for Good Friday. It is the start of the Spring Break for the school. She was hanging out with her boyfriend and driving his car. She hadn’t come home last night as she stayed at her boyfriend’s mother house.  This seems where my daughter may be moving to. She is still looking for someone to look after her, but she is the one who wants to be control. This is where she will have a problem with her boyfriend’s mother who is the type to tell my daughter “this is MY house and if you don’t like it, you can move type” of mom. She has already discussed rules she excepts in her household with my daughter. My daughter does not like rules. I can’t wait to see the outcome of this. I do hope and pray my daughter can obey her boyfriend’s mom’s rules when she moves into their household. This decision of her moving into her boyfriend’s mother’s house surprised her dad because he thought she would get an apartment of her own.

Anyway, today has been great. Took even a late afternoon nap. I feel so refreshed not being under so much stress. I checked my blood sugar through out the day and it is getting better and better towards the normal range. This is what I am working towards, getting healthier.

I was asked to help out in a organization I belong to with assisting on their board more. I was so glad I was asked to help by the CEO and founder. By her showing her trust in me, helps with my self esteem.

I do have a problem with my self esteem. I don’t always think the best of myself. In someways about my daughter, I feel I have failed as a mother. Part of me knows that is not true. My emotions have been yo-yoing  back and forth for the past 24 hours.

Have had to take 2 shots of Novolog of 6 units so far today to keep my blood sugar in control better. I need to feel in control of something in my life.

So I am trying to stay busy today helping others and getting a few things done on my list. This will help to take my mind off of my home and family life.

I had the chance to try a new soft drink that has come out on the market as a Limited Edition. It is Diet Dr. Pepper Cherry Chocolate. I was pleasantly surprised at the great taste. I have missed the taste of Chocolate Covered Cherries. The amazing blend of that taste and Dr. Pepper and it is diet too! This is getting a great treat with no calories.

Being a diabetic, I am always looking at new products that have come on the market for diabetics. I told a friend of mine about this soda pop as she calls it. The next day, I found a 12 pack unopened on my porch from a friend. This was so nice of her. She really likes the taste too. I now have 3 -12 packs, since they are limited edition.

I know as a diabetic to watch how many diet soft drinks I consume.

As many of you readers know, I have been struggling with my 18 year old daughter. Today started off no different than any other day with her. She is the type you do NOT talk to within the first 30 minutes or you will get a tongue lasing.  Even though she seems to spend 24/7 on her cell phone talking to her boyfriend. I am not allowed to talk to her unless she needs something from me. That is her prospection of what mom is allowed to do to her.

Today was her appointment with her bi-polar doctor. I picked her up from school to take her to this appointment. I asked her doctor if I could have a moment of her time. She gave me the meanest look. I knew then that it wasn’t going to be good when we had a moment to talk. I had the gut feeling that her one sided view of me from my daughter’s conversation with her was biased. After her time with my daughter, she sent my daughter out to get me. As soon as I walked in the door, she stated in a mean voice, “What have YOU got to talk to me about?” I attempted to explain that my daughter’s dad and I agreed that the new medication was not working well for my daughter due to the aggression she was showing us. It was very evident that she didn’t care what I had to say by what she said to me. I was so shocked at her attitude of unprofessional-ism and vulnerability to my daughter’s manipulations. My daughter unfortunately is a pro at it. Some of our other family members have stated that for many years. My daughter is very good at convincing you she is a princess and does no wrong and that everyone in the world is the blame for all of her problems. Even 3 of her longtime best friends have ended their friendships with her in the past month because they finally realized what she is and got tired of her drama.

We all have bent over backwards to help my daughter. After her graduation, she is definitely moving out. She has thrown that in our faces too many times that she is moving out. So now it is final. We can’t take it anymore here in this household. We love her very much, but she is dragging all of down emotionally from all the stress and drama. Time for her to face the real world and what it cost to live in it. I’m too tired to fight this anymore. I will miss her but not all the drama and manipulations. I do love my daughter very much.

Hopefully I can start feeling better when I can keep my diabetes under control from less stress.

My van has to go in the repair shop again. Being a 18 year old van does not help the situation. Having an 18 year old daughter that doesn’t have a vehicle of her own yet and has to be drove to work is a problem when my old van needs repair.

The fact that the van is not drivable is another problem. The mechanic will have to come to my house to fix it. Thank goodness I live across the street from the mechanic shop.

The additional repair bill this month is stressing me out along with my 18 year old daughter. My diabetes and stress do not go well together.  It causes my blood sugar to rise too quickly and then I don’t feel too good again.

My daughter refuses to ride in a taxi or on a local city bus system. The local city bus system is very nice and only 75 cents one way.  The taxi in our town cost $7 one way. That is so much cheaper to ride than driving my old van, but still she refuses. Told her dad that she needs a taste of the real world and what it cost to live in it on her own soon.

She ended up getting someone from work to drive her to her dad’s job. He took a break and drove her home. He spoils her too much. It hurts me that he doesn’t realize he is just making matters worse in not letting her grow up.